Christmas Eve

I don't know what it is about this year, but everyone I talk to seems to think it doesn't feel like Christmas Eve. I agree. I've been feeling the same way lately... It just isn't the same anymore. It's not as exciting... I'm involved in all the Christmas plots (We'll get you this, and her this, and Mom this, then we can all trade three months later), our lights display, normally so elaborate, was dead on arrival, and there seems to be an abnormal amount of tension surrounding everyone. We've all forgotten how exciting Christmas used to be, and we're all caught up in our grown-up troubles and thoughts.

I kind of miss the old days, but I know it's time. It'll never be the same. No use dwelling on it now.

What can you do.

I went to church tonight. Real church. Catholic church. No offence to all you protestants and "other"s, but your churches just don't do much for me. It could just be my obsessiveness talking, but the ritual and the humility of the Catholic church is really comforting, even if I don't really believe what they're saying half the time. I could actually see myself becoming Catholic, and suspending my agnosticity every Sunday morning, just for the sake of peace of mind. You could almost say it filled a little of the spot where Christmas used to be.

Seems a lot of entries today have been of a depressing tone.

Sorry I couldn't be the exception.

At least tomorrow, I can suspend it all. Just stay in the moment. No worries on Christmas.

Right?